Вот нашли список очепяток и ошибок в резюме:
(надо пойти свое прочитать еще раз 🙂

“I am a rabid typist.”
Cover letter: “Thank you for your consideration. Hope to hear from you shorty!”
“I am relatively intelligent, obedient and loyal as a puppy.”
“Reason for leaving: It involved the Inland Revenue and Interpol.”
“Proven ability to track down and correct erors.”
“Am a perfectionist and rarely if if ever forget details.”
“As indicted, I have over five years of experience analysing investments.”
“Accounting Cleric.”
“Instrumental in ruining entire operation for North West chain store.”
“Education: Curses in Liberal Arts, curses in Computer Science, curses in Accounting.”
“After receiving advice from several different angels, I have decided to pursue a new line of work.”
“Here are my qualifications for you to overlook.”
“Achievements: oversight of entire department.”
“Work history: Performed brain wave tests, 1879-1981.”
“References: None, I’ve left a path of destruction behind me.”

“Disposed of $2.5 million in assets.”
“Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer.”
“Don’t take the comments of my former employer too seriously, they were unappreciative beggars and slave drivers.”
“I am loyal to my employer at all costs…Please feel free to respond to my CV on my office voicemail.”
“Title: Another CV from the ‘Profiles in Excellence’ series.”
“Please disregard the enclosed CV – it is terribly out of date.”
“Size of employer: very tall, probably over 6’5″.”
“Qualifications: No education or experience.”
“Finished 8th in my school in a class of 10.”
“Also Known As: Mr. Productivity, Mr. Clever, Mr. Fix-it.”
“I have an excellent track record although I am not a horse.”
“Trustworthy references available upon request – if I give them a few quid.”
“Let’s meet so you can ‘ooh’ and ‘ahh’ over my experience.”